Random phone pranks!
by The Devious Angel
Summary: Ben get's bored and decide's to annoy Vilgax with stupid things over the phone. WARNING insanity occurs!
1. The insanity begins

_this writing means ben's talking._

**this writing means vilgax is being annoyed**

(ringing)

**Hello?**

_I want a bird._

**..........What?**

_Can I have a bird?_

**Who are you?!**

_I want my bird!!!_

**Why are you calling me about birds!?**

_You may kiss the bride!!_

**WHAT R U TALKING ABOUT!!!!!??????**

_It's a small world after all, It's a small world after all._

**?????????**

_WEEEEEEEEEEEE_

**WHO IS THIS!!!!!!!!!??????**

_Your mom._

**YOUR NOT MOMMY!!!!!**

_Well your not Kelly Clarkson._

**WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANY OF THIS!!!???**

_You stole the pickle!!!_

**WHAT PICKLE????!!!!**

_The one you stole._

**I DIDNT STEAL A PICKLE!!!! NOW WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU NOT MAKING SENSE????!!!!**

_I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world._

**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

(runs out of room screaming)

(over the phone you can hear...

"Ben what are you doing?"

"I'm driving Vilgax crazy." ^w^

"Why?"

"Because I was bored and had nothing to do, Gwen.")

* * *

**So what do you peoplez thinks of chapter 1.**

**If u like it I'll make more.**

**If you dont this will be the only one.**

**Also if u have a suggestion please tell me.**


	2. Singing and orders

_this writing is ben's lines._

**this is vilgax.**

* * *

(phone rings)

**hello?**

(talks in girly voice) _hi i just called to say were through honey!!_

**um....what?**

_you heard meh, im breaking up with u dear!!_

**i dont even know who you are!!!!!!!!**

_(normal voice) welcome to mcdonalds. ^W^_

**wait a minute what happened to the confused girl and im not at mcdonalds!!!!???**

_do you want fries with that shake?_

**WHAT SHAKE!!!!?????**

_would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?_

**THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!!!!!!**

_go home and shave yur big head of smell with yur bad self!!!_

**THAT MAKES NO SENSE!!!!!!!**

_it doesnt have to, i got a monster truck!!!! room room room WEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!_

**LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_put a banana in your ear~_

**I WILL NOT PUT A BANANA IN MY EAR!!!!! NOW STOP SINGING OR ILL DESTROY YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_ya gonna make biscuts? ya gonna make biscuts? ya gonna make biscuts?_

**NO MORE!!!!!!**

_fred fredburger fred fredburger fred fredburger fred fredburger fre-_

**NOOOOOOOOO NOT FRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!** (runs off crying and screaming 'no more fred')

back on earth......

ben is sitting at mr. smoothy and laughing.

reiny walks up and says

"wats up benben?"

"i just played another prank call on vilga-wait what r u doing her?!"

"i have found the greatest thing your planet has to offer.............pokemon!!!!"

"............."

"jigglypuff is awsome!!!!^w^" reiny yells as he runs off.

"that was weird.......and clefairy is better than jigglypuff." ben says.

* * *

and thus ends another chapter of this bizarre story.

btw in this story there will occasionally be random moments after the call.

such as reiny being a pokemon fan.......and your both wrong!!!

eevee's the best!!!!!!

so review, fav or dance like a monkey.

until next time......if u peoplez want more.


	3. Im Vilgax!

Me: Hello people of earth, the moon and disneyland! It's time to start another chapter of this random story.

This chapter is based on one of the reviews I got for the story by someone named Invader kiwi phantom.

_Ben: get on with the story!!!!_

_me:_ NO JUICE 4 YOU!!!!!!!!

_Ben: ha!! i already drank it!!!_

_me: _NO JULIE 4 YOU!!!!!!!!!

_Ben:NOOOOOOOO!!!_

(phone rings)

**Hello?**

_This is Vilgax prepare to die!!!!_

**IM VILGAX!!!!**

_No your not, I am!!!!_

**You are not me!!!!!**

_Prove it._

**YOU PROVE IT!!!!!!**

_If your the real Vilgax then you should prove it!!!!!_

**FINE!!!!!!!!! I AM VILGAX!!!!!!**

_SO AM I!!!!!!_

**IM VILGAX!!!!!**

_Are you sure your Vilgax?_

**I am SURE!!!!!**

_Then what kind of underwear does Vilgax have?_

**PINK!!!!!**

_I am not wearing pink underwear._

**IM VILGAX!!!!!!!**

_Really?_

**I......THINK I AM!?**

_I'm still Vilgax._

**ENOUGH!!!! ( hangs up) **

**That was annoying!!!**

(phone rings)

**Hello?**

_Hi I would like to order a large pepperoni pizza._

* * *

me: That's another chapter, next time will be a special chapter because......

**Vilgax: I will be wearing pants.**

me: OMG WHERE DID YOU COME FROM!!!!????? ...........never mind, the real reason it's special is because instead of Ben calling...it will be Kevin........Ben got sick after too many smoothie's and no Julie.

Ben: JULIE!!!!

me: until next time............review, fav, and watch out for evil salsa.


	4. kevins turn

Me: konnichiwa random Ben 10 fan's.

It's time to start this weird story.

today Kevin will be calling instead of Ben who got sick on smoothy's and is in the care of Julie.

Julie: open up wide for your medicine.

Ben: no it taste's like the evil egg pie guy!!!

Julie: um what??? 0____0

Me:now here we go!!!!

* * *

(Vilgax is in a important evil people's meeting......and he's wearing pants!!!!!!)

**......and then we will put the cheese down the hatch and it will-**

(phone rings)

**Hello?**

_Dont forget to change your underwear!!_

**Mommy is that you?**

_Do you happen to know a woman named 'Ima dufoss'?_

**No i dont know Ima dufoss? (i'm a doofus)**

(everyone laughs)

**Stop laughing or i'll kick your puppies!!!!!**

_You've got the map!!!!!_

**What does that have to do with anything!!!!!**

_Tell me where the banana tree went!!!!!!!_

**WHAT BANANA TREE!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????**

_Let's gather round the campfire and sing our campfire song, our c-a-m-p-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g- song._

**STOP SINGING MY FAVORITE SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_There is no spoon._

**WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!!??? WHO ARE YOU!!!!?????**

_Do you know the muffin man?_

**NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_why?_

**because there is no muffin man!!!**

_why?_

**because you cant be a muffin and a man!!!!!**

_why?_

**cause it's stupid!!!**

_why?_

**AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHUDDUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_.........why?_

**WHAT NEXT!!!!!!!!**

_Watch out for the hobo!!!_

**STOP THIS!!!!!!!**

_Welcome to canada, land of french fries!!!!_

**I HATE FRENCH FRIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

(random guy) I like french fries.

**BE QUIET BOB!!!!!!!!!!** (throws phone at Bob and phone breaks)

**There now both annoyances are gone.**

(another random guy) OMG YOU KILLED BOB!!!!

**he wasnt important..now let's continue......then the soda will go up his pants-**

**

* * *

**

review, fav, and watch out for flying banana's.


	5. ZarbZarb and Surgeons

HELLO EVERYBODIEZ!!!!!!!!!!!

ben has gotten better and will be calling vilgax again!!

kevin : i liked doing that to vilgax!! how come ben gets to do it!!??

me: dont worry your going to prank call vil-dork from time to time.

* * *

(vilgax is in the shower when the phone rings)

**IM COMING!!!!!!!! **( puts on pink rubber ducky robe)

**hello?**

_hi i would like to speak to zarbzarb._

**who is zarbzarb?**

_would you like a bagel?_

**i thought you wanted to talk to zarbzarb?!**

_does he want a bagel too?_

**there is no one named zarbzarb here!!!!!**

_what about my poodlephant?_

**WHAT POODLEPHANT!!!!!??? WAIT WHAT IS A POODLEPHANT????**

_time to dance in salsa!!!_

**ANSWER MY QU-WHY WOULD I DANCE IN SALSA!!!!!!!!!??????????**

_my bulldog is in a bikini._

**wait are you THE SAME GUY WHO ALWAYS CALLS ME???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_banana split._

**WHY DID YOU SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_bingo!!!!!!_

**WHAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!????????**

_(hangs up)_

**HELLO!!! HELLO!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LONELY!!!!!!!!!!!! TALK TO ME AND MAKE WANT TO KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

* * *

and now a short story about ben and kevin!!

"kevin why are we dressed as doctors?" ben asked

"because we were bored and decided to go to the hospital and be doctors." kevin answered

"oh ok!" ben said smiling ^w^

they go into a operating room andcome out a while later.

"i cant believe you used a chainsaw to cut the guy open then close it with duct tape!!!!!" ben yelled

"you were the one who put a squirrel in him!!!" kevin yelled

"well he needed a home after i broke his tree with my corn shooter!!" ben replied

"i hate being a doctor.........lets be firemen!!" kevin said

"yay i get to go in a red car!!!" ben said happily.

* * *

review, fav and make sure you gots no squirrel in you.


	6. Burrito time!

****

hello everyone!!!

im not gonna waste yur time with introductions.

so lets start the story.

* * *

(phone rings)

**Hello, this is Vilgax.**

_Hi i'm calling about your burrito you ordered._

**I didnt order a burrito?**

_Did you say you wanted turkey or a hobo in it?_

**I SAID I DIDNT ORDER A BURRITO!!!!!!!!!**

_and how would you like your shoe cooked?_

**I DO NOT WISH TO HAVE MY SHOE COOKED!!!!!**

_and would you like some chair dust with that?_

**WHY WOULD I WANT THAT!!??**

_Because it's yummy-yummy. ^w^_

**LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_My banana is smarter than you._

**I AM SMARTER THAN YOUR BANANA!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_(singing) you spin me right around baby right around like a record baby._

**LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_LOOK ITS GODZILLA!!!!!!!!!_

**WHERE??!!! WAIT A MINUTE.....HEY!!!!! GODZILLA'S NOT HERE!!!!!!**

_i love you._

**really?**

_no._

**NOW THAT WAS MEAN YOU HURT MY FEELINGS!!!!**

_now whats q plus potato?_

**NOW THAT WAS JUST RANDOM!!!!!**

_wrong its quamquots._

**ENOUGH!!!!!!!!**

**(HANGS UP PHONE)**

**that guy is so annoying, i should ask ben tennyson to destroy him.**

**(turns around to see godzilla)**

**OMG GODZILLA'S REALLY HERE!!!!!!!!!**

**(godzilla burns vilgax)**

* * *

thats all for this time.

if anyone has any idea's id be happy to hear them.

so fav, review, and make sure you fed your armadillo.


	7. Vilgax has wrong guy

hi peoples! starting today im going to start writing this story a little differently.

b= Ben-Ben ^w^

v= Vil-dork

* * *

(phone rings)

v- Hello, this is Vilgax.

b- I smell like peanuts.

v- ........good for you....

b- will you read me a story mommy?

v- I'm not your mommy!!!!!

b- WAAAHHHH I WANT A TEDDY BEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!

v- what the heck???

b- GIVE ME FREEDOM TO RUN IN LEMONADE!!!!!!!!!!

v- YOU SIR MAKE NO SENSE!!!!!!!!!!

b- your butt is shiny. ^w^

v- WHY DID U SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!????????????

b- shinie, shine, shiners, shine, pickle.

v- LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

b- I ripped my pants.

v- I DON'T CARE!!!!!!!!1

b- your a biiiig nerd.

v- I AM NOT A NERD!!!!!!!!!!!

b- ham tastes like pig.

v- IT IS PIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

b- I have to give my banana a bath nao. BYE BYE!!!

(hangs up)

v-ok i have had enough of that guy!!!

random person on ship- the signal was coming from earth, in bellwood, from someone with the initials, B.T.

v- I KNOW WHO HE IS!!!!!!!!!!

(drives ship to earth.

lands in front of Ben's house.

gets out.

goes to the house NEXT to Ben's

breaks down door and yells)

v- BOB TOODLES PREPARE TO DIE!!!!!!!!!

bob- what'd I do?

v- LAWN GNOMES ATTACK!!!!!!!!!

(bob is beaten up by lawn gnomes)

* * *

i wont be able to update as often as usaul from nao on.

fav. review and eat pants.


	8. Ben AND Kevin

me- hi everyone!

if you are hoping for a story with action, adventure, drama, tragedy and romance.

then look sum where else cause this story doesnt have any.

this is random phone pranks.

today ben and kevin have teamed up and are doing a prank on vil-dork together!

* * *

(phone rings)

v- hello?

b- where's my slaw?

v- what the...

k- where'd you put the slaw?

v-what slaw?

b-mommy he took my slaw!

k- give him back his slaw!

v- i dont have it!

b- sharing is fun.

v- what happened to the slaw?

k- so you DID take the slaw!

v- no i-

b- bad kitty! BAAAAAAD!

v- what's going on here!

b- were your guardian fairy pigs.

k- and we will grant u one wish.

v- wow thanks! i wish for-

b and k- SPAGHETTI!

v- huh!

k- here's your spaghetti.

b- but i already ate it.

v- then what do i get?

k- ugly fudge ladies!

b- with hankies.

v- YOUR THE WORST FAIRY PIGS EVER!

k- were not pigs.

b- were pigs.

v-THATS THE SAME THING!

(goes insane and hangs up)

and now for a little extra.

alternate ending for the final battle.

(ben, gwen, kevin, and max are barbequeing)

gwen- i wonder what happened to vilgax?

max- i made calamari.

kevin- why is it green?

ben- and tastes like stupid?

* * *

fav, review and feed your tv.


	9. Vilgax calling

HI PEOPLEZ!

today is a very special episode

today were mixing it up and having Vil-Geek call ben!

* * *

(phone rings)

b- Hello?

V-Your feet smell like hands!

b-...ok..

v-I WANT YOUR YELLOW CONDIMENTS!

b-Mustards in the fridge.

v-Oh..um well...IM GOING TO THROW A MOOSE ON YOU!

b- Really! I always wanted to be hit by a moose!

v- NO DONT BE HAPPY! FEAR THE MOOSE!

b- Why?

v- BECAUSE ITS A MOOSE!

b-Why would I be scared of a moose?

v- (whisper's away from phone) He's got a good point.

v- NOW GIVE ME YO MAMMA!

b- OK! (to his mom) HEY MOM CAN I GIVE YOU TO SOMEONE ON THE PHONE?

Ben's mom : No

b- She said no but I can take yur name and phone number and have you come back later.

v- oh really that wou- WAIT A MINUTE!

b- Can I ask a question?

v-sure.

b- WHY IS YOUR HEAD SO BIG!

v- MY HEAD IS NOT BIG!  
b-PIE!

v- WHAT!

b- I WANTS SOME PIE BABY!

v- LEAVE ME ALONE!

b- YOU CALLED ME!

v- OH RIGHT!

b- WHY ARE WE YELLING?

v- I DONT KNOW!

b- Can I hug you?

v-

(hangs up)

v- Why did I ever try to prank call him!

v- He's more annoying then the guy who always calls me!

Random guy- Sir I think Ben is the one who calls you.

v- Dont be ridiculos!

(throws guy out airlock)

(knock on door)

v- I'll get it.

(opens door)

v-Hello?  
b- HUG!

* * *

review, fav and Wear Butt-hats


	10. Ben's latest prank victims

Hola chico's y chica's!

Time for the next chapter!

Sorry its been so long but ive had school.

* * *

(phone rings)

V: (sneezes) hello?

B: welcome to candyland!

V: can we please not do this today, im sick.

B:fine…can i call next Friday?

V: sure.

(hangs up)

B: now who do I call…

K: hello. Kevin speaking.

B: I LIKES ME SOME PUDDIN!

K: what!

B:where's mah spoon?

K: what spoon!

B: I WANTS MAH SPOON!

K: shut up!

B: this be some good pie mon'.

K; why are you speaking Jamaican?

B: WEEEEEEEHOOOOOWEEEEEHOOO

K: wait a second….is that you Ben!

B: …no its….NO HABLA ESPONOL! (translation: I DON'T SPEAK SPANISH!)

(hangs up)

(phone rings)

G: hello, Gwen here.

B: AHM ON FIRE!

G: Huh?

B: I smell like a bunny.

G: good for you….

B: I gots me a pickle ice cream pie!

G: ok then…..

B: NOOOOOOOOO! MY FRENCH RESTURANT!

G: what happened?

B: IT MOVED TO SWITZERLAND!

G: ok Ben that's enough! I know its you.

B:…NIHONGO GA DEKIMASEN! (translation: I DON'T SPEAK JAPANESE!)

(hangs up)

(an hour later)

Benji is sitting alone on his couch.

(doorbell)

Ben walks over and answers.

B: hi!

( Kevin and Gwen jump out in scary costumes)

B: ( Girlish scream) OH MAH GOD! ( runs in)

G: now remind me why we did we do that?

K: payback for the prank call, also I wanted to see him wet his pants.

* * *

Hope u liked it. Also vote in my poll for the next chapter plot,

Fav, review, and dont feed pigs bacon.


	11. Drive through and watermelon

hola everyone.

heres the latest chapter!

today im mixing it up and having it take place at a drive-thru instead of the phone.

* * *

(vilgax is working at burger king)

V: i hate my job..ok next in line.

(Ben's car pulls through drive through.)

V: welcome to burger king may i take your order?

B: quamquot.

V:...huh?

B: where's my pony soup?

V: we dont sell pony soup.

B: back in my days candy only cost a dime..

V: ok...

B: may i take your order?

V: wha-IM SUPPOSED TO TAKE YOUR ORDER!

B: DON'T TAKE MAH ORDER! GET YOUR OWN!

V: WHO ARE YOU!

B: la cucaracha, la cucaracha...

V: STOP SINGING AND TELL ME YOUR NAME AND ORDER!

B: ding-dong-ding-dong-ding-dong-cookie-dong.

V: WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT!

B: All the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies, now put your hands up!

V: WHY ARE YOU SINGING!

B: Blubber butt!

V: STOP IT!

B: knock knock.

V: oh whose there?

B: Justin beiber.

V: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(Ben goes through the drive through and see's Vilgax in window.)

B: HI VILGAX!

V: oh hi Ben Tennyson, hey were you the one pranking me?

B: nope, look.

( show's he is wearing a ' i didnt prank vilgax' shirt.)

V: oh ok, carry on.

(Ben drives away.)

* * *

and now a random one shot...

B: KEVIN HELP!

K: What's up?

B: i got a watermelon stuck on my head!

K: how did that happen!

B: i was told i was hard headed and to see if its true i tried to break a watermelon with my head!

K: ( insert ROFL here)

B: why are you laughing?

K: figure it out yourself, hey i bet it would break if you ran into a wall.

B: really? ok then!

(runs into wall and falls down)

B: ...it didnt work...(passe's out)

K: HAHAHAHAHA

fav, rev, and remember to thank your lawnmower.


	12. Mystery caller

Hello people of earth!

This is the newest chapter of rpp.

Im typing this from my school classroom.

Today a mystery people will be pranking vil-poop.

The persons name will be revealed in the end.

Here we go!

* * *

(phone rings)

V- hello this is Vilgax speaking.

?-I am your father!

V-WHAT!

?-I like chicken.

V- I didnt know u liked chicken daddy.

?-the armpit spaceship is on planet glubglub.

V-….huh?

?- im david spinkledorf!

V-i thought you were mah dad!

?-no im Penelope fartzenburg!

V-WHY DO U HAVE 2 NAMES?

?- quack quack quack.

V-…are u a ducky now?

?-(singing) hes the magical old timey bathing suit that lives in the himaylays, they call him klimpaloon.

V-WHO THE FUDGE IS KLIMPALOON!

?-CUCUMBER DOWN! I REPEAT CUCUMBER DOWN!

V- WHAT R U TALKING ABOUT!

?-SNOW!

V-WHAT ABOUT SNOW? WHO ARE YOU REALLY?

?-SANTA! OHMYGOD!

V-WHAT ABOUT SANTA!

?-PUT YOUR PANTS ON!

V-I DON'T NEED PANTS!IM AN ALIEN!

?-unicorns are pretty.

V-well….yes they are…

?-RAINBOW MONKEYS!

V-WHAT?

?-im a leprachan now.

V-you are!

?-you'd make a pretty girl.

V-0_0

(hangs up)

(later)

?-How was that, Ben Tennyson?

B-Wow Asmuth your actually pretty good at pranks and random insanity.

A-Thank you….lets go get some pie sharks.

B-okie dokie.

* * *

So Asmuth was the caller!

I was going to make Gwen or Rath do it but I though asmuth would be more unexpected.

I will do others if enough people ask but ben and sometimes Kevin will be the caller mostly.

Review, fav, and spin your leeks and sing polka


	13. Kevin Vs Ben

Hello peoplez.

Today were mixing it up and having the sooper awesome bad boy Kevin prank call ben the idiot.

Enjoy.

* * *

(phone rings)

B- Hello Benji speaking.

K- GOTTA CATCH EM ALL!

B- WHAT DO I HAVE TO CATCH?

K- I like cereal flavored potatoes that taste like hamsters.

B- Wow they have potatoes like that!

K- (singing) I love you, you hate me, lets all go and kill barney.

B- YAYZ!

K- (still singing) then go and kill Benji.

B- 0_0 I don't like this song anymore….

K- He's coming for you…

B- WHAT! Who is?

K- He's gonna get you…

B- OH GAWD WHAT DO I DO!

K- THE MACERANA!

B- I HAVE TO DANCE!

K- NO! you have to bake cookies and feed them to king garbawhositz!

B- …..WHO?

K- Can I get a pizza with that?

B- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!

K- The more you learn.

B- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! WHO ARE YOU!

K- I'm Darth vader, I am your father.

B- OMG REALLY!

K- NO!

B- aah.

K- OMG I GOTS SEIZURES FROM PORYGON!

B- WHAT ARE YOU-

K- ok bye bye,

(hangs up)

B- uh that's so annoying. It's such a pain when someone calls you and says dumb things to you…well time to call vilgax!

And now a short

* * *

Here are some things that happened off screen to gwen and Kevin.

G- hey Kevin do you like me.

K- of course i-

(Ben comes in)

B- HELP! HELP! MAH HAIR IZ ON FIYAH! (runs around the room screaming.)

G and K- 0_0

~later~

K- Hey Gwen?

G- yes Kevin?

K- will you g-

(BenBen comes in)

B- GUYS LOOK! MY POTATO CHIP IS SHAPED LIKE JUSTIN BEIBER!

K- CURSE YOU JUSTIN BEIBER!

~later…..again~

K- ok Gwen I have waited almost 2 years to tell this to you, I lo-

(highbreed crashes in)

H- WHATS UP YO!

K- AAAAAH! (bangs head on nearby pole.)

* * *

And there you peoplez go.

Also how many chapters do you think I should have for this.

Also I am excepting idea's.

So review, fav and tell your neighbores aardvark ghost stories.


	14. Creeping out vilgax and rath's turn

KONNICHIWA MINNA-SAN!

Its time 4 random phone pranks.

Ben will dive in piranha infested waters, vilgax will shoot lasers from his eyes that disintingrate asmuth's legs, and Kevin whispers love songs to a ninja!

And while none of that will happen, this will be funny.

* * *

(ring ring)

V-I'll get it! Hello?

B- QUAMQUOTS!

V-…..huh?

B- everybody dance now! Dun dun dun da dun.

V- 0_0

B- where did ya put mah leg arms?

V- what is a leg arm!

B- OH NOES!

V-WHAT?

B- MY AVACADO IS A PORCUPINE!

V- LEAVE ME ALONE!

B- llama land is now open for the moose's!

V- SHUT UP YOUR ANNOYING!

B- …

V-Hello?

B-….IMMABGLARGHARGH!

V- AAAH! YOU SCARED ME!

B- .

V- YOUR CREEPING ME OUT!

B- I know where you live…..im coming to give you muffins with snake buttons…

V- OK STOP IT NOW!

B- MAH BOMB IZ GONE! I named him Jackson-mcglarglarg.

V- LEAVE ME ALONE!

B- I's gonna kills you's now's!

V- WHAT!

B- my ham is moldy and I will hit you with it!

V- ENOUGH!

(hangs up)

* * *

and now…..

(rings)

V-hello?

R-LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING VILGAX! MY TOOTH IS A STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE!

V: hey your not the moron who calls me!

R-I THINK BEARS LOOK LIKE ROCKS WITH MUSTACHES!

V- 0_0

R- GIVE ME YOUR HAIR REMOVAL BLANKET!

V- I DON'T HAVE ONE!

R-YOU SMELL LIKE A FLOWER IN THE STREET WITH MAYONAISE ON IT!

V- NO I DON'T!

R- MY MOM BAKED ME A TREE! IT TASTES LIKE MOO!

V- I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOUR SAYING!

R- BE QUIET YOU LADY GAGA WANNABE!

V-I AM NOT A LADY GAGA WANNABE!

R- THAT'S MAMA LUIGI TO YOU!

V-SHUT UP!

R- IM GOING NOW! YOUR ANNOYING ME!

(hangs up)

* * *

there you go, also the last scene took place while they were giving the tiffin to that red guy and rath was bored on the ride there.

Review, fav, and do a dance about monkey babys.


	15. Ben goes crazy and stuff

hello and welcome to random phone pranks!

stay tuned after the stoopidness for an important announcement.

* * *

(ring)

V: I'll get it!

(answers)

V: Hello?

B: Mah Boi!

V: IM NOT YOUR BOY!

B: i wonder whats for dinner?

V: how should i know!

B: Im riding my hotdog on a weeener!

V: Ok what the blarf are you talking about?

B: imma gonna give your car a nice pee shine maam.

V: wha-I AM NOT A MAAM AND WHAT IS A PEE SHINE!

B: MAN DOWN! RUN FOR COVER FROM THE POODLES FROM PLANET DINGLESHMITZ!

V: WHAT!

B: UNCLEAN CABBAGE!

V: STOP IT!

B: chicken down in the ranch said im got an eggplant jam!

V: ok now your making absolutely no sense.

B: i...have...a...BANANA!

V: OMG YOU DO?

B:...no

V: Jerk.

B: what time is it?

V: its 5:46.

B:no...its hamster wheel time! (sings the hamster dance)

V: Ugh stop it!

(music starts to play)

V: oh great now what?

B:...im not doing that...

V: if your not then who-

(Rick astley comes out of nowwhere and sings)

R: Were no strangers to love, you know the rules, and so do i.

B: OH MAH GAWD ITS RICK ASTLEY!

V: NOOOOOOO WEVE BEEN RICKROLLED!

* * *

ok now that thats over, i'd like to announce that this story shall end on chapter 20. so 5 more left, i am currently having a poll on my profile for my next story. the winner will be written first but i am eventualy going to write them all.

so fav. review and- (Rick astley comes in and sings)

R-Never gonna give you up never gonna let you down.

B- OH EM GEE HOW'D YOU EVEN GET IN HERE!


	16. Triple Threat

hola minna-san, its random phone pranks back for Ben 10 week. also let me just add that skylark evanson has written an awesome phone prank story inspired by this one and if you like this then check hers out too. its hilarious.

today Ben and Kevin AND Gwen have teamed up to prank Vil-barf.

here we go!

* * *

G: are you sure this is ok?

B: of course, I do it all the time.

K: and I do it when im bored.

G: ok..

(phone rings)

V: Yello? (He's trying to be cool and not say a normal hello.)

B: GIANT SHRIMP ARE IN MY UNDERPANTS!

K: GET THE LIFEGUARD OFF THE FISHING BOAT!

V: What in the...?

G: HELP MY TUNA IS ON FIRE IN PHILADELPHIA!

B: OH NOES!

K: THE TURTLE!

V: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!

B: my lawnmower had baby kitten's.

K: I named one steve.

G: I made mine a meatball tablecloth.

V: HOW DOES A LAWNMOWER HAVE KITTENS IN THE FIRST PLACE!

K: I think my grandma is a tire swing because she looks like a bunny rabbit.

V: ok I am totally lost.

B: PAFFENDORF!

G and K: YAY!

V: WHAT ARE YOU DOING! WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!  
G: Were the magical gnomes that live in your sock drawer to eat your paperclips.

V: NOOOO MY PAPERCLIPS!

B: I think somebody wants a hug!

K: I think somebody put too much mayonaisse in the bicycle.

G: I think spoon.

V: I think you people are crazy!

B: IM AN ITALIAN MUSTACHE ON A LEEK!

K: I buried dora in the backyard.

G: my name is paul the moose.

V: BE QUIET YOU PEOPLE!

G: Who lives in a pinapple under the sea?

K: MY SANDWICH!

B: ...doorknob.

V: ENOUGH!

(hangs up and throws phone at the tv repair man.)

meanwhile Ben, Gwen and Kevin were laughing so hard that Ben fell down the stairs.

* * *

so did you all like it?

also vote on my profile for my next story after this and check out my other stories.

fav. review and spit on your lampshade.


	17. Random fight!

Hello peoplez of fanfiction!

its time for Random phone pranks!

today we have another chapter of randomness, pie, horseshoes, and lampshades.

...ok we dont really have the last 3 but we are random!

* * *

(ring ring)

V: UGH IM COMING!

(picks up phone)

V: Hello Vilgax residence.

B: Switch to geico today!

V: You again? Dont you ever get tired of this!

B: Do penguins hate meatballs?

V: FINE LETS SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT!

B:(singing) I'm on a bridge! I'm on a bridge! why do I sing I'm on a bridge!

V: (also singing) Me and Psyphon we will have our revenge! him and me will take your leather pants!

B: Rudy's got the chalk!

V: im swinging on my banana boat!

B: IM A FLYING IDIOT!

V: IM A DELICOUS WEINER!

B: my mom says potatoes make beans and corn go to the lobster to shake their tailfeathers!

V: I want to name my baby George hamster alfred asparagus spoon octagonapus dingleshmitz!

B: my foot believes the tooth fairy stole my wallet while i was at the new mexican mustard river of cheese!

V: my dad...is a football playing mickey mouse of toiletries and donuts filled with macoroni!

B: Welcome to my home made of ginger pork fries and bathtubs of cinnamin monkeys that explode in chili!

V: I pushed Timmy down a well so that he may be the chosen one of the onion rings of ohio with my uncle steve the french speaking indian dog puppet!

B:(moment of silence) Mayonaisse.

V:NOOOOOOO I CANT BE MORE RANDOM THEN JUST SAYING MAYONAISE! YOU WIN!

B:(clapping) Yay me! ^w^

* * *

and now a moment of Ben doing something stoopid.

Ben is looking up at the ceiling and staring. Kevin walks up and asks.

"What are you doing?"

"I want to see if the roof will do something when I stare at it."

"Ben...your an idiot."

"Yeah..."

Kevin then walked off but before he did he stole Ben's wallet when he wasnt looking.

8 days later...

Ben is still staring at the ceiling, then he realizes...

"Hey! I'm not an idiot!"

* * *

and so ends another chapter.

only 3 chaps left to go. but I will do my best to be random and silly for them!

so until then review. fave. and do the macerana in a bikini.


	18. Attack of the idiot Ben

hola peoplez.

here's the new chapter, i put this up on Dwayne McDuffie's forums a few months ago for a test but im guessing no one read it.

* * *

( phone rings )  
Vilgax: hello, this is Vilgax speaking.  
Ben: the cake is a lie.  
Vilgax:...it is!  
Ben: my dad...is a...spoon.  
Vilgax: what?  
Ben: OH MY GOD A GIANT ROCK!  
Vilgax: OMG Where?  
Ben: my hamster likes to destroy toothpaste with my aunt Bob Marley.  
Vilgax: please shut up now.  
Ben: not till I find the mysterious ticking noise!  
Vilgax: ok just SHUT UP AND TELl ME WHO YOU ARE!  
Ben: I'm a pirate robot dinosaur ninja monkey hobo...FROM SPACE!  
Vilgax: oh my gawd that is so cool!  
Ben: MY SPLEEN! OH MY BEAUTIFUL SPLEEN!  
Vilgax: seriously just SHUT UP!  
Ben: escucha mi corazon in mi pantalones.  
Vilgax: I have no idea what you just said.  
Ben: so does your face.  
Vilgax: oh no you di-idnt!  
Random guy: oh yes he di-id!  
Vilgax: quiet you.  
Ben: ok I have to go, my tuna killed a donut shop again and I have to save it's Swiss cheese omelets! Bye tell Lucy I said hi!  
( hangs up )  
Vilgax: WHO'S LUCY?

* * *

and now...

Ben: KEVIN!

Kevin: WHAT!

Ben: I. MADE. TOAAST!

Kevin: good for you...

Ben: SOUTH DAKODA!

Kevin: (backs away slowly)

Ben: nyeah nyeah nyeah!

Kevin: (picks up his phone) Hey Gwen, Ben's finally lost it.

Ben: rutabega?

* * *

so fav. review and dont clog your toilets.

sorry its kinda short but i only had a few inutes to write it all.

also check out some of my new stories coming soon.


	19. More nonsense

Hey kids do youknow what time it is!

Random pirate: Tea party time?

NO!

its time for random phone pranks. Ben and Kevin haved teamed up again.

STAY TUNED AT THE END FOR AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

* * *

( ring ring)

V: oh boy a call! Helloo?

B: PANDAS!

K: LINGUINI!

V: ...oh glob..

B: how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

V: HOW THE HECK SHOULD I KNOW!

K: Double rainbow!

V: WHAT DOES IT MEAN!

B: NYEEEEEEEEEEEHH

K: NYEEEEEEEEEEEHH

B: NYEEEEEEEEEEEHH

K: NYEEEEEEEEEEEHH

B: wombat.

V: YOU PEOPLE MAKE NO SENSE!

K: what is bigger an elephant or the moon?

V: ELEPHANT YOU IDIOT!

B: I baked you a pie.

V: oh boy what flavor?

K: PIE FLAVOR!

V: alright enough games. WHO. ARE. YOU. PEOPLE!

K: were the magical elves that live it your shoe.

B: im jorge and this is poacho.

V: Well prepare to feel my wrath Jorge and Poacho!

K: does it itch?

V: wha?

K: does your rash itch?

V: I SAID WRATH!

B: LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING VILGAX! I KNOW RATH AND YOU AINT RATH!

V: STOP TALKING TO MEH!

K: THE SOUP IS DOWN! I REPEAT THE SOUP IS DOWN!

V: what are you talking about?

Both: NOODLE ARMS!

V: i cant stand you!

B: you know who else cant stand us? MY MOM!

V: SHUT UP!

K: glarfenshnarf!

B: Bingonia!

( they hang up )

V: mark my words Jorge and Poacho, I WILL FIND YOUUUUUUU!

* * *

ok so there's only one chapter left to post for this story. however i am going to be uploading 3 special one shot phone prank stories with diferent shows soon. they'll be like this but with different characters.

until next time fav, rev, and kiss a monster truck


	20. The grand finale

So here we are, the final chapter. It's been fun but all good things must come to an end. I think I should stop talking now and just get on with the grand finale.

* * *

(ring ring)

V: coming! (answers phone) hello?

B: my foots in the pasta!

V: what...

B: Double rainbow!

V: what does it mean!?

B: gnome puking rainbows!

V: huh?!

B: now who wants to put on some blindfolds and get in my car?

V: Yay! Wait what?

B: doom llamas are approaching the spaceship! The bananas are going to become men now!

V: seriously, what the heck!?

B: my Armpit smells like Christina aguilara. With a hint of nachos in the middle of Saturn.

V: shut up already!

B: in the name of the moon, I shall fart on my grandpa.

V: why won't you shut up?!

B: ney ney the baby goes ney.

V: what the fudge flip?

B: when I take a bath I always thank the sky walrus for the cotton candy clouds.

V: I want some cotton candy clouds!

B: my momma says I draw like a diseased rat.

V: ok, that's weird.

B: you know who else is weird? My mom!

V: is that a regular show reference?!

B: gobble gobble gobble

V: you sound like a turkey!

B: I have decided to live with the peas in the sewer of rotting cabbages.

V: good for you...

B: my undies are too tight!

V: too much information!

B: make a contract with me.

V: no!

B: I taste like buttered garbage on a hot summer day.

V: ok, now will you please shut up!?

B: not until you learn that friendship is magic!

V: Why must you keep talking to me!?

B: Futari wa Pretty Cure!

V: (tries to plug his ears, realizes he has none)

B: when I grow up I wanna make a sandwich out of all the ugly corn in Philadelphia.

V: (tries to put on headphones but they don't help)

B: fat hobos stole me wallet and fed aunt winma to the sharks.

V: ( gives up on covering his nonexistent Ears and gives a defeated sigh)

B: Lenny is stuck in my pants!

V: leave me alone!

B: not until my waffles are done.

V: I will pay you to shut up.

B: the warehouse that sells bacon discovered a normal corpse in the cereal box cave.

V: I will give up evil if you shut up!

B: I love kittens that come from dinosaur land.

V: (bangs head in annoyance)

B: read me a story mommy?

V: once upon a time I killed a guy who prank called me. The end!

B: I want mah moose, he did a good thing and freed the wild animals in the zoo.

V: shut up!

B: baloney is good for the skin.

V: shut up!

B: burrito explosion!

V: be quiet!

B: fine but I have one thing to say first.

V: what?

B: I want a bird.

At that moment Vilgaxs mind snapped and he started screaming like a maniac and running through the Spaceship he was on. He freaked out and went crazy yelling stuff like "gablarrghawarawarargh!" as he totally trashed the place. 10 minutes later the crazy people came and locked up Vilgax. Before he was taken away however, he got a text from Ben. It read 'u been phone pranked' and Vilgax screamed

"BEN TENNYSON!"

Although for the record he still wasn't aware that Ben was the guy who pranked him. He just screamed because he was angry that Ben knew how to text him.

* * *

and so we come to a close. Thanks for reading all these years. Maybe one day I'll upload another prank. But this story is over for now. It's spiritual successor is my short upcoming story '5 ways to annoy Vilgax'

Until then check out my other stories, fav, review, and prank your enemies.

Goodbye random phone pranks, Stay gold.

Bang.


End file.
